Words you type online don't disappear the way spoken words do.
They stick around — and they can travel further than you expect.
💡 The big idea
When you say something unkind out loud, the words disappear after a moment.
The person remembers how they felt, but the words are gone.
When you type something online, it works differently.
The words can stay there forever — and the person can read them again
and again, especially when they're already feeling low.
Online kindness is one of the most important kinds of kindness there is.
📱 Why online is different
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Words don't disappear
A typed message or comment stays until someone deletes it — and sometimes even after that.
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They can be shared
Anyone can screenshot or forward a message. You can't control who sees it once it's sent.
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You can't see their face
You can't tell how someone is really feeling when they read your words — sometimes people are more hurt than they let on.
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They can be read again and again
Unkind words online can be read over and over — each time can feel just as bad as the first time.
🎮 Talk about it
Read each situation out loud and discuss. There's no single right answer — the point is to think it through.
Situation 1: You send a joke to a friend in a group chat and some kids laugh, but one person seems quiet after. You're not sure if it hurt their feelings.
Worth checking in? What would you say?
Situation 2: You see a comment on a game or video that's mean about another player. Other people are ignoring it.
What would a kind person do? What are the options?
Situation 3: Someone sends you a message that makes you feel bad. You want to send something back that's just as mean.
Why might waiting 10 minutes before responding be a good idea?
🦸 Bystander or upstander?
When you see something unkind happen online, you have a choice about what to do.
😶 Bystander
Someone who sees what's happening but doesn't do anything — they scroll past, stay quiet, or just watch.
🦸 Upstander
Someone who sees what's happening and does something kind — says a supportive word, tells a trusted adult, or simply refuses to pile on.
Being an upstander doesn't have to be big. Sometimes it's just:
sending one kind message to the person who was hurt, telling a grown-up what you saw,
or choosing not to share something unkind further. Small choices add up.
🛡️ When unkind things happen to you
Don't respond right away. It's okay to wait. Sending something back while you're upset usually makes things worse — for everyone.
Screenshot it. Take a screenshot of the message or comment so you have a record. Don't delete anything yet.
Tell a grown-up. Show them the screenshot. You don't have to deal with this alone — it's their job to help you figure out what to do next.
Block if you need to. Blocking someone is not rude — it's a safety tool. A grown-up can help you do it.
"I saw something online that wasn't kind. Can I show you?"
Say this with your child three times. Then have them say it alone. This is the sentence that gets help.
💚 The upstander challenge
One act of online kindness this week.
It can be a nice comment, a supportive message to a friend, a compliment on someone's project,
or just choosing not to share something unkind.
Tell your grown-up what you did — that's the whole challenge.
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The Kindness Champion Sticker
Award this sticker when your child completes the upstander challenge,
tells you about something unkind they saw online, or asks for your help before responding
to something that upset them. All three are exactly what this activity builds toward.
The sticker is for choosing kindness — even when it would be easy not to.
🌱 Signs it's working
Your child pauses before responding to something that upset them online.
They come to you when they see someone being treated unkindly — even if it's not about them.
They think about how the other person might feel before sending a message.
They understand that saying nothing can also be a kind choice in some situations.
Normalise bringing online things offline: If your child shows you something
unkind they saw — praise them for telling you, even if it was minor.
That habit is the one that protects them when something bigger happens.